I HATE DEPRESSION

Tuesday, February 19, 2019

Our last conversation together

I don't know. I am speechless actually. I just don't get it. I received a message that my cousin/sister brought her life to death yesterday due to depression. I have read some articles from people who are caught by this serious, silent disorder and it was really bothersome. I am also not sure if my cousin actually recognizes that she has depression. You may not know it or not, it is still a disorder needed to be taken seriously just like other diseases. I believe, the first step of endless steps was the awareness that you have such a disorder. That is why people were raising awareness, especially to the youth today to get to know that there was such this disorder and we have to do something to it. But that doesn't end the fight against it, struggling to daily life was another thing you need to conquer every day. I can't say how/what exactly people with depression really feel, but I can sense it was so painful that even me living ordinarily felt my everyday burden/struggles in my daily life. 

I am a nurse by profession but I think I have to re-read again what depression really looks like.

According to NIMH, depression (major depressive disorder or clinical depression) is a common but serious mood disorder. It causes severe symptoms that affect how you feel, think, and handle daily activities, such as sleeping, eating, or working. To be diagnosed with depression, the symptoms must be present for at least two weeks.

There are different types of depression and it says that there is "no-size-fits-all" treatment. 

It was like the difference between acute and chronic pain. Chronic pain lasts for more than 6 months and it doesn't only relieve by medications, but you have to plan other management to alleviate/ease the pain. It is a long-term process. That is why maybe people who openly shared their fight through depression described it as fighting/struggling daily for their life. We can imagine how hard it was to struggle daily, but we will never feel how they really felt deep inside.

It is true that there is no face of depression. The definite way is to recognize it by ourselves. It is difficult.

Working as a medical professional overseas enlightened me that we really have to break the barrier (stigma) in our country in handling people with mental disorders. In my everyday work life here overseas, I met almost everyday people with psychological disorders and they handled it as common as hypertension. My mind was blown out checking that my patient complaint was 'she requires conversation'. Maybe I am not used at first with the set-up, maybe we don't actually openly talk about mental disorders or maybe we seclude/isolate people with mental disorders to the point that only they are left fighting by themselves.  I have only a lot of MAYBEs. Thinking of it, I, again MAYBE, not taken it seriously. Then, my beloved cousin caught by depression and all was left to me was WHY? If you feeling so down lately and it is disturbing your work-life daily balance, you might want to check/consult with a doctor to find out what 'treatments' to help you.

I would like to quote again from the NIMH website (National Institute of Mental Health
Depression, even the most severe cases, can be treated. The earlier that treatment can begin, the more effective it is.

Sabi nga nila, sa huli ang pagsisisi. I may not have carefully check on my cousin's signs and symptoms (symptoms also varies). And what I can do now is to take part to spread awareness. Share it to everyone and be informed. Lastly, let's check on each other.

Rest in Peace, Sharmine! My real sister from another mother. Rest now.

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